Rewrite the rules … or drop them entirely!
Ease the stress and see each other in a new light
Couples Counselling in Bushey, Watford, Hertfordshire
Relationships can bring out the best and worst in us at the same time! Many couples find that once the honeymoon period is over, the excitement and passion that was there gets replaced with lower frequency emotions such as complacency, mundaneness and boredom. Left unchecked, this can cause a relationship to spiral even further downwards, lead to miscommunications and allow even lower frequencies to set in such as rejection, apathy, anger, resentment, jealousy, abuse, frustration, loneliness, depression etc.
I have found these lower states or emotions are often the result of previous unresolved trauma or baggage that have been given a chance to be triggered once the higher vibrational state of the honeymoon period has worn off.
This baggage often has nothing to do with the partner as it was there prior to the relationship. Unfortunately though, it is our partners that often have to bear the brunt of this unresolved trauma.
By working through this unresolved trauma in BOTH partners, it gives each individual a chance to see their partner in a new light … and more often than not, invite something even better than was their previously.
Couples counselling is for any couple serious about improving and rapidly changing the quality of their relationship with each other and with themselves. Many may consider my approach somewhat unique but those who have been through it have been pleasantly surprised with the results.
Couples counselling is available in Bushey near Watford, Hertfordshire and in Clacton-on-Sea, Essex. Sessions are available weekdays, evenings and weekends (subject to availability).
Whether you want to address current issues or take your relationship to another level (including seperation if that is what you desire), resolving negative emotions and detoxing some of your baggage is a good place to start 🙂
Couples Counselling Approach
Let's all get together
It all starts with a conversation about how you’re both feeling and assessing what the most dominant issues affecting the relationship are. HOWEVER, if you want to this individually, that’s also OK. We will still end up at the same place.
Release the triggers
I will work with you INDIVIDUALLY to help you release the negative emotions and patterns that are creating stress in the relationship. By releasing internal stress, you will automatically see each other (and yourself) in a new light. I will work with both of to reach a new level of understanding about the relationship. One in which you are both less triggered by each other and your immediate environment.
As your relationship reaches a new level of understanding, it invites the rememberance of a more trusting and loving dynamic. The dramas will reduce and you will be able to co-exist in a way that feels more natural to each individual.
What Relationship Counselling can help with
- Relationship triggers
- Trust issues
- Feeling lonely in the relationship
- Intimacy issues
- Anger and resentment
- Feeling insignificant or dominated
- Love loss
- Family strain
- Financial issues
- Seperation or Divorce
- Quick to anger / temper
- Pet peaves
- Always seeing the worst in your partner
- Feeling put down
- Raising children
- Family dynamics
- External interference
How many sessions will we/I need?
This depends entirely on what you want to achieve and the depth of the issue(s) you have.
What if my partner will not come?
You can still get benefits even if your partner does not want to participate. After all, if you release your biggest issues or complaints you have about your partner, won’t YOU be triggered less? Better still… won’t THEY also be triggered less? I have seen many relationships transform by just one person undergoing a release. It’s still better if both undergo the process though.
Can you help us seperate amicably?
Yes. I can help you release some of the baggage you brought into the relationship so you don’t carry it to you next one and also help you to release the stress around seperation. This can also help to reduce or eliminate legal costs. After all, if you’re both less stressed it opens the doors for a more amicable parting.
Why do you not see us both together for the release work?
Relationship hang-ups are usually unique to the individual and therefore, the process to address these hang-ups is also very personal and individual. Even if a partner is an observer, it can influence the willingness of the partner going through the session to open up. So this part is best left seperate.
How does the process start?
It starts with a chat with both of you. We will all ascertain what the most dominant issues are and agree a set of realistic expectations and the next steps to address them. This will help formulate our plan for the personal transformation sessions on your next individual visit. During this first visit, you will have an opportunity to put forward your perspective in a safe and neutral space, free from judgement. If you feel you would both rather do this individually (and many couples do) just let me know.